My struggle with being vulnerable (Part 5) – Conclusion

Once I figured out what was at the core, I started to uncover all other fears that stemmed from this.  In the past, acting from the heart has caused me to feel like I lost.  To not feel like that ever again, whenever I feel like acting from the heart, I let my intellect take over.  I push my heart aside and subdue all emotions.

To understand how to let go of the intellect, I diligently focused on it from then on.  I read a lot, watched a few videos, and then started to watch 2 Bollywood movies (almost 3 hours each) back to back.  And in the middle of the second movie, it just clicked.

I realized that it wasn’t about letting my intellect go, it was about telling my intellect to put the heart at the front and take go after what the heart wants.  In other words, it isn’t the heart versus the intellect; it is intellect doing the heart’s bidding.

E.g.: If I like someone, don’t let the intellect tell you all the reasons to not go after that person; tell your intellect that your heart wants to go after that person and come up with all the ways to make that happen.  If I fail, then find another way.  There is a risk of losing, and getting your ego hurt.  Feeling like a loser is an ego thing.  I guess that’s also why you want to work on getting your ego under control and get rid of it.

To summarise: Go after what the heart wants.  If you fail, learn from it.  Then go after it again.  Use the intellect, rather than lead from the intellect.  If the intellect is in the driver’s seat, the heart is the master in the back seat directing the driver where to go.